Treading Water

*It could have been minutes or days since Wrath had stood in the kitchen archway and spoke a single sentence that had spun my world on its axis. “Vishous is missing.” Three words. Five syllables. And with them, time stopped. I had only the vaguest memories of anything in the following moments. I’m sure he’d said more but, I didn’t hear it. Nor did I notice when he left with George trotting jauntily in front of him. Since then I’d been treading water, my will to wake each day relying solely on our son and the hope that the rising sun would bring news with the return of the brothers. Shaken from the fog I now lived in when Sahvage whimpered in my arms, my wiggling young restless as he often was since his father had been taken. My stomach rolled as a fresh wave of fear took hold of me, taking shaky steps to the sofa and dropping into the rich leather upholstery just as my legs went weak. It was so common now as to be expected, my nerves too fried to eat or sleep more than minutes at a time in the oppressive emptiness of our mated bed. Illness and desperation had shortened my temper even more than usual, the combination resulting in a nasty confrontation with the doggen who’d tried to change the sheets on our mated bed. Flying into a hysterical rage at the thought of Vishous’s scent being washed clean of the midnight silk, I’d lunged for the wide-eyed doggen, knocking her off of her feet before Butch had pulled me off with the assurance that our bed wouldn’t be touched. I tugged down the collar of my shirt and pulled Sahv close to let him nurse. These moments with our child were the only thing that came close to calming me anymore. The passage of days was marked by the timed opening and closing of the shutters. Seventeen times. Eight days, I’d counted. Smoothing a hand over Sahv’s hair as he ate, I waited for the shutters to rise once more and with them the thunder of Butch’s boots racing down the hall of the pit to join the others in the search. I’d been clinging desperately to any shred of hope I could glean from the scant bits of information that filtered in from the brothers as they returned from their nightly search. My hellren was gone. Missing. If he wasn’t in the SUV that had to mean that whoever took him wanted him alive. Shifting my son in my arms, I looked up at a soft voice in the doorway. “Jodi? Is there anything I can do?” Marissa’s eyes were wide with worry; certainly for her own male who needed Vishous to purge the evil that he inhaled from the lessers he killed.* No, Marissa. Thanks. *She nodded and seemed to want to say more but I just didn’t have it in me to entertain her coddling. Right now I had to think of my male and our son. She left as silently as she’d entered, to hold her own vigil in the room she shared with her hellren. Sahv babbled softly and pulled away, popping a chubby fist into his mouth and chewing mercilessly, his newest tooth already beginning to break through his gums. I knew the brothers were sparing nothing in their efforts to bring V home but, they couldn’t possibly expect me to wait forever. I looked down at our son, seeing his father’s crystalline eyes and for the first time I could remember, I prayed, a single tear slipping down my cheek. Be it God, the Scribe Virgin, Buddha or fucking Cthulu, someone had to hear me* Please, don’t let him give up. Please… they’re coming, nallum. Just hold on. For us.